Sorry it took so long to post.... I've been busy!

Well.... I honestly don't have much to say... I have been busy and really haven't had the time to do much relaxing or thinking.... Gma is in one of her crazy Bi-polar moods.... And it's enough to drive me to drink!! Grandma is leaving for our cabin tomorrow and is going to be gone for like a week and I am rather excited about it!I can spend time with my boyfriend without having to worry about grandma calling every 30 seconds asking when I am coming home.

I went to the beach the other day and I got my tan on... more like burn on.... I am still burnt in some places like my shoulders and on the top of my legs.... But now I am starting to peel like crazy... It's rather disturbing. I feel like I am turning into a snake... and after I'm done peeling, I'll be as white as death again... :(

So I am just rambling... I am super tired! Sorry!

My head is spinning....

It's weeks like this that I wish I was the energizer bunny... I have SOO many things to do in SO little time.. Today my sister asked my to babysit Rylee for two hours while she got her nails done for her friends wedding tomorrow... Being a nice sister I said yes.... Well two hours turned into six hours.... I had to rush to work because I was running late because I had to find somebody to pawn Rylee off on to.. Well it was my grandma and she got pissed... But anyways.. I rushed to work and I walked into work and looked down at my feet.... realized I was wearing flip flops... Thats a big NO NO in the pharmacy.. So I had to call my grandma to bring me my work shoes... AGAIN she wasn't very happy with me...

Due to baby sitting Rylee for six hours.. I had a ton of stuff I wanted to do but couldn't.. So when I got home from work tonight.. At ten o clock.. I had to start working on everything that I wanted t work on during the day. had a quick bit to eat, then I baked a cake, tried finishing a scrapbook for my uncle Charlie, cleaned the kitchen, unlocked the door and waited for my brother to get home... No I am FINALLY in bed and it is almost three in the morning

Tomorrow I have to get up early, shower, probably do my sisters hair for the wedding, find something to wear to the wedding, finish the stupid scrap book (hopefully), then go to the wedding and reception, go over to my aunt and uncles house and clean for fathers day.

Sunday I have to FINISH making the fathers day cake, and then I can FINALLY relax for a few hours...

I'm said I only have one day off of work this week... and It's not even on the same day that my boyfriend has off.. So I don't even know when I get to hang out with Al next week... He works days and I work nights..

I remember summers as a kid I could just go to my cabin, or to the pool and spend hours swimming or doing nothing besides playing games and being a lazy little child... Haha boy how things change.

Well.... It's past three in the A.M. now.. I have to be up in 4 in a half hours. I should be off... Night world.. see you in 4 and in a half stupid hours!

p.s. Sorry for any typeos... I am too tired to go trough and re read this...

Kimmy update...

Well Kimmy came home finally and she has to wear a hat or helmet on her head...... But she had a stroke last night and went back in the hospital last night at 11:00.

Life and family ..... Oh geez

I don't even know where to begin.... Life is a huge giant roller coaster right now... At night I can't sleep.... I'm either babysitting, working, with friends, or laying in bed trying to sleep... My mind is so cluttered with shit lately I think it might explode.

I found out tonight who really cares about me and who really is my family... My grandma has been sick for a while now... She has Parkinson's disease.

Over the years with My dad's side of the family I feel like I've been trying to act like an adult and I've been trying to form relationships with them... But I have found it impossible.. And now that my grandma is extremely sick and is dying... I have all these mixed emotions. What could I have done to be a better granddaughter? Called her more, made more plans with her more, offer to help? I don't know.

I feel like I have never really been good enough for My dads side of the family. I got a phone call from my sister tonight that grandma was really bad and I felt very grateful for her calling and letting me know... but why didn't our dad call and let either one of us know earlier...

When I was younger my dad had two heart attacks. I found out them days after the fact that they happened... The only reason why I found out about the second heart attack was because I had called my dad to ask him for my sisters address or phone number or something to that extent and my step mom told me he had a heart attack and that he was in the hospital...

Am I not good enough? Should I have tried harder to maintain a relationship with these people?

I am sad that my grandma is really sick.... but I am also very upset that nobody in the "family", Besides my sister, would call me... and or her to let us know what the hell is going on... If grandma doesn't make it to Christmas this year I don't think I am going... She's the only reason why I went to Christmas the past few years.. Just to see her and see how's shes doing, I think the rest of them really wouldn't care... They've never even celebrated my birthday which is the day before Christmas until two years when my big sister said something about it.

Anyways....

My brother just turned 21 today.... And my sister and I had a party for him at her townhouse. I woke up to a big crash in the kitchen and I see my brother peeing in a recycling bin butt ass naked in the kitchen..... How can somebody get that drunk and walk around naked peeing in random shit? I love my brother dearly... But he needs to stop drinking and learn how to cope with his problems sober. Which he hasn't been able to do since he was at least 15 years old..

What a world that we live in.....

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Nothing too interesting.....

Well..... I don't have much to write about... Life is pretty boring and non drama full at the moment.. Work sucks.... Summer is rainy and cold... My brother is mad that I am dating his best friend.... Grandma is mad that the guy I am dating is almost 22 and has a almost 8 month old... My cousin Kimmy is getting better.. The infection in her brain is still there, but is slowly going away. My other cousin Gene is driving up from Florida as we speak and should be her tomorrow night to take over my room and sleep on my bed while I get booted to the guest bedroom which has the worlds smallest and oldest bed...

I don't even know what to say right now... the past couple of days have been such an emotional roller coaster... My head is spinning! I cousin Kimmy has had three brain surgery in the past week. First surgery was to remove two very large tumors... Thank the lord, they were not cancerous. The second and third surgery were because she got a mass infection in her brain and her head was swelling and getting full of fluid... So the doctors but a stint in her brain and also removed part of her skull..... She has a huge soft spot on the side of her head, kinda like what babies have when first born.... and the doctors don't know if they can put the park of her skull back in her head, or if she'll have to wear a helmet for the rest of her life so nothing hits her soft spot on her head and kill her if she even recovers from this staff infection she has in her brain..... I just hope that Kimmy doesn't have to be in anymore pain.... Hopefully she can get better and recover.... We don't know how bad the brain damage is yet due to the infection... But she thinks her daughter is dating Brad Pitt and that he will take care of them and pay all there bills.....

If it weren't for Kimmy though, I wouldn't be here today... Kimmy is who introduced my parents to each other.

Also... I have myself a new boyfriend.. his name is Al. He's amazing. We've been on 6 dates now? and although at times I find myself missing Luke, I am moving on and for once holding my head up high and feeling confident and enjoying every second that I spend with Al. I can be myself around him, I get hyper, I laugh, we have tickle wars.... which he usually ALWAYS wins because if he even wiggles your fingers in front of my face.... I burst out laughing just by the thought of being tickled! My grandma thinks he's a "good kid" but doesn't like the fact that he has a child.

So life is very interesting right now... Many good things happening, but many stressful things happening as well.

God watch over Kimmy and help her to get better.